Thursday, December 13, 2007

my thoughts...

Nasib pengangguran.... ga ada kerjaan, jadi banyak mikir... ga tw mo ngapain, akhirnya isenk nulis buah2 pikiran gw di blog... moga2 ga ada yg baca.... (tp klo ga mau di baca, knp di post??! doesn't make sense... emang dasar manusia ga jelas...) hwawawa...

aniwei... gw cerita deh hari ini gw ngapain aja...
sebenernya ga ngapa2in sih... cuma ngurusin surat2 buat perpanjang visa... trus cari2 kerja juga... (but what's the point klo in a month gw bakal balik indo?? niwei, tetep aja gw browse2 kerjaan biar ga keliatan pengangguran bgt... so pathetic, isnt it??)
trus, pegi dinner di resto jepang sumwhere di sth yarra... (bener ga ya?? hueehhe :p lupa)
the dinner was great.... dalam rangka ultah soni (ke-26)... (thx ya son ^_^)
then, i got home.... trus, mulai deh ga tw mo ngapain.... gw coba telp co gw, tp didnt really help, berhubung dy masi kesel ama gw... hahaha... salah gw juga sih, maen ngebatalin "janji" tanpa alesan yg jelas.... (pesen gw buat yg kirain pacaran itu obat buat ngilangin kesepian... u r totally wrong!! klo kesepian, cari temen!! bukan ce ato co!!)...
aniwei, lalu gw duduk depan komputer... buka internet, en cek friendster... trus liat foto2 temen2 en sodara gw... dan pikiran gw mulai deh melayang...

pas ngeliat foto ci cen2 n koko... mulai mikir...
"so sweet..."
"haahaha.... these two people are in love..."
"it's wonderful how God helped two hearts to find each other's half..."
pokoknya intinya ngiri deh.... (ngiri dalem artian positif loh tpnya)... ngiri yg seneng juga ngeliat mereka bedua look happy in the photos...

trus...
liat profile dd gw... hmmm... Linda... what can i say about her??
"ck ck ck... dd gw dah gede ya?? ga berasa.... hahaha... (bitter laugh)"
"miss her actually... but i knew... klo ketemu pasti bakal berantem kayak biasa... hahaha (another bitter laugh)"
kenapa ya?? gw gengsian bgt jadi org??
when i love someone, bukannya gw berusaha nunjukin, gw bakalan mati2an nutupin perasaan gw... hahaha... dasar manusia aneh... it's not a sin to show love to the ones u love, you know?!
sumtimes i wonder... kapan ya gw bisa belajar jadi sahabat buat dd2 gw?? not being the annoying big sister... :( sedih juga sih... hahaha (one more bitter laugh)...

i guess gw lagi rada mellow nih... lagi down... ngerasa jadi org yg ga bener.... apa2 ga becus...
ga bisa nyenengin org laen... sll nyusahin org laen... existent gw ga ada gunanya di dunia... blah blah blah... and all those negative thoughts... gee!!! i cant believe my self sumtimes...
how can a person like me, ngaku klo gw adalah christian?? so negative...
but, probably, karena gw ini so negative, therefore i'm a christian coz i need Christ more than anything else in this world... bersyukur bgt gw bisa kenal Tuhan... Tuhan yg sumbernya hope, sumber love, sumbernya justice, sumbernya everything!! :)

blank... ga tw lagi mo nulis apa... my small brain's too overwhelmed by the amount of thoughts in my little head... so, i guess.... gw bakal stop di sini deh... en hopefully i'll stop thinking negatively by stop writing about negative thoughts... :p

Graduation

Yep, as you can see from the title...
It's gonna be about the graduation that i have attended yesterday... 12.12.07
Most of my friends were graduated yesterday... and i'm so happy for them...
For they have achieved what they were trying to achieve in the past 3 years...
which is to gain "Bsc." to be written at the back of their names... :p
It was an amazing experience and is a privilege for me to attend their graduation ceremony...

Somehow, to see them graduated keeps me to focus on my goal, which is to graduate next year!! ^_^ i've gotta keep the fire burning... jia you!!!

PS. after all that, what's next?? job? work? further study? only God knows... and it's our part to decide the next step and to strive for the best! :)