Sunday, February 08, 2009

a reflection on life

Hmm... sumhow lately, I have a lot of time to reflect on my life (yea, life is my favourite topic...)
Well, I didn't reflect particularly only on my life, but probably more about life in general...

Yesterday, my friend's daughter celebrated her 2nd birthday... And the adults were all busy preparing the food, clean up the house and do other things related to the party...
While the bdae girl didn't seem to realise that we're doing all these stuffs for her sake...
She was tired due to lack of sleep from the previous night and not in a good mood due to the hot weather... (ohh, poor little nat2...) She was cranky a few times and created some troubles for herself... Because she was cranky, her mum was getting annoyed and mad... and came the thunder!
If you have been in that kind of situation, you'll know what I mean... hot day, tired, limited preparation time... not a good combination for a 2 year old party....
Anyway, while I was helping (didn't do much since I was lack in energy as well), I was thinking... How ironic this situation is... the mum (no offense here... buat yg ngerasa, jangan tersinggung...) tried to do her best to make her daughter happy... She thought she'll give the best for her kid... when in fact, what her daughter really needed is her time, her attention, her mummy... Well, I don't blame the mother... she's tried her best... also becoz she's one of my best friends, and I know how hard her life has been... but, it's juz so ironic... when life seems so complicated, and when u think of it again, it kindda simple if we don't try to please everyone...
It's juz a lesson I've got from yesterday...

Lately, I've been trying to work out what I need to do in life...
Not sure which way I should go... I try to make the best and wisest decision I can make by considering the advices I've received from friends and relatives... but in the end, I'm goin no where... ohhh, so frustrating!! >_<
Hahaha... I sounded so like sumone who don't have faith in God...
I kind of know why I'm so confused, it's becoz I don't know what I'm looking for in life... I haven't found my purpose and therefore I don't know where to go coz I haven't decide on the destination yet...
I know I don't want to live for money, coz I have heard so many stories about ppl and money...
Neiher fame and power.... What I wanna do is helping people... give hope to others... show love to the unloved... but I don't know what to do or where to start... and I'm far from an angel... I'm such an evil sumtimes that I don't think I will be able to do it...

Anyway... That's an update news bout my life... ;)